I swear this wasn’t my idea for a topic. Actually, when Red and I first talked about doing some inter-blogging between our sites, I briefly considered suggesting NIP (nursing in public) as a topic but then thought, “Well, we surely have the same views, so that won’t make for a good discussion. Plus, is this even worth writing about? Isn’t it a non-issue?” and let it drop. I was wrong. Apparently we don’t have the same views on this topic, and apparently it isn’t a non-issue. Or, in other words, it’s an “issue.” So, let’s discuss.
Before I jump into talking about breastfeeding in public, I think it makes sense to talking about plain old breastfeeding (that which occurs within the confines of one’s own dwelling, for instance). Babies are born to breastfeed. Breast milk has been touted as being “best,” and it is-nothing comes close to supplying your child with the nutrients, antibodies, comfort, and super-yummy taste as breast milk does-but more than that, it’s normal. It’s the default. Humans are mammals, and thus, make milk for their offspring.
Okay. Enough about that. I could write pages and pages about the benefits of breastfeeding, but that isn’t what this post is supposed to be about. I’m supposed to be writing about the controversy that is breastfeeding in public. Oh the horror! A baby eating!
I think the best way for me to go about writing on this topic is to address some of the, ahem, concerns people have about mothers nursing in public. First, there’s this urban legend that nursing mothers tend to “whip it out” when breastfeeding their children. I wish Snopes would write an entry on this because honestly people, NURSING MOMS DON’T WHIP IT OUT! Well, I’ll qualify that. Early on in a breastfeeding relationship, new moms might find it easier to breastfeed her child without a shirt on. Sometimes it’s hard to see if the baby’s latch is good when you’re trying to maneuver a shirt out of your way. By the time mom is ready to be out and about for any real length of time, chances are she has a good handle on nursing and can do it without feeling the need to charge admission to the show.
Second, and this goes hand-in-hand with my first point, people sometimes claim that breastfeeding is offensive/disgusting/gross/obscene/whatever asinine adjective you would like to use and that it should be done in private (if at all… again, icky!), or if it HAS to be done in public, a blanket should be placed over the baby and mother as not draw attention to the fact that the child is eating. From a breast. A few things about this line of thinking: Breastfeeding is normal. Any issue that *you* have with it is simply that-your issue. It’s not mine or my child’s or that mother’s over there. There is no such thing as the right not to be offended. If you don’t like looking at something, be it the ass crack of your friendly neighborhood plumber, the muffin top of high school girl walking down the street, or the mother breastfeeding her child, the simple solution is to look away. Personally, big, red, curly afros offend me, but I still visit the Naked Redhead whenever I drive through the lovely state of OH, and I somehow manage to resist handing her a paper bag for her head each and every time. Which brings me to another thing… Uhm, draping a big old blanket over half your body and your baby’s is a sure-fire way to draw attention to the horrible, sinful act that is occurring. Nothing screams “HEY LOOK AT ME!” more than an awkwardly placed blanket with little baby legs sticking out from one end. For me, especially early on, you couldn’t even tell when I was nursing Jude. Usually it looked like I was carrying him as he slept. I suspect it’s like that for most mother/child combos.
People often make the mistake of, uhm, suggesting, that mothers breastfeed their babies out of the public eye. In a bathroom, for instance. I don’t know if I can address this disgusting idea without flying off the handle, but I’ll try…
No.
I’ll let it go at that. I’m sure my intelligent readers don’t need me to spell out how horribly insulting it is to suggest to a mother that she feed her child in a germ/poop/piss-ridden bathroom. Thinking about it, I wonder if the “Why don’t you feed your baby in the bathroom?” response is another urban legend. I mean, people don’t really say that to nursing moms, do they? I mean, no one would think to take a nice juicy steak into a bathroom stall and chow down, so they certainly wouldn’t try and encourage a mother to breastfeed her child in one, right? RIGHT?
Finally, I would like to say a word about discretion. In regards to breastfeeding, I really find “discretion,” and its derivatives, to be a dirty word. I hate, hate, HATE hearing that mothers should be discreet when nursing in front of other people. Why, you ask? Simply because discretion is subjective. If I’m wearing a nursing tank top with a shirt layered over it, I can breastfeed Jude and not show more than one square inch of boob, and really, you would only see that skin if you were sitting on top of me looking for it. Because I don’t show much skin, I often get “Oh, you’re so discreet when you nurse!” (insert looks of joy), and I rarely get hassled (though I was, once. Let me know if you would like to hear that story.). *sigh* It shouldn’t matter how much skin I show or how much any mother shows. What this all boils down to is this: when you see a mother nursing in public, you’re simply witnessing a mother feeding her child. That’s it. No more. No less. If it offends you, look away. If you see a mom breastfeeding and the baby pops off and serves you up an eye-full of nipple, realize that you see more boobage each time you walk past Victoria’s Secret, and let it go.
This topic should be tabled. I can’t for the life of me understand the controversy here. Even more, I can’t believe that Red doesn’t have my back. But then again, she’s a closet Republican.
Check out what the bat-shit crazy Naked Redhead has to say on the topic here.
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