You left at 6:15 this morning, and I’ve been missing you ever since.

This morning, Jude and I ate oatmeal for breakfast. He did a bang up job of eating. I trimmed the cats nails and scooped the litter box. After picking out some clothes to wear, he and I got the bike trailer hooked up to my bike, and we headed out to shop at The Harvest.

After huffing it home from the co-op, Jude and I put on our bathing suits and headed to Jarvis Beach to play with Dash and Stella and their families. Jude rode in his wagon and ate a peanut butter and honey sandwich on the way. Atena gave me a beautiful dress that I think you would love to see on the floor me, but sadly, it’s just a touch too big.

Nap time followed beach time. Sadly, the boy napped for less than an hour. When he woke up he was fairly pleasant, and for that I was grateful. Jude and I ate pasta while watching Toy Story 2 and reading Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, respectively. As the movie wrapped up, we filled our mop bucket with water and headed out to the patio to water our plants. Jude and I found a BUNCH of new little tomatoes on our tomato plant! We were both very, very excited. I can’t wait to harvest them.

Since I didn’t get to around to all the food shopping I needed to for the week this morning, Jude and I walked to Dominick’s and the fruit market after we got done with the plants. Jude alternated sitting in the wagon and walking alongside me while in each store. We picked up some ice cream to help us through the week without you.

Tracie made enchiladas for dinner tonight, and she offered to share some with us! They were fantastic. I was worried Jude might not like them because they were a bit spicy, but he ate his right up (that and some split pea soup). While Jude ate dinner he watched Toy Story; while I ate I read more HP.

Bedtime was about 40 minutes ago. Jude got up once (so far) and told me he wasn’t tired. When I insisted that it was indeed time for bed, he looked me in the eyes and said, “NO, Woody.” Then I told him that he “Need[ed] to recharge [his] batteries, Buzz.” That got a smile out of him, and now he’s (seemingly) asleep.

The bed looked awfully big tonight as I pulled down the sheets and centered Jude’s and my pillows. I wish you were home. I don’t like sleeping without you.

Be safe, and remember I love you.

Love,
me *=

Handsome devil, isn’t he?

I consider myself to be a very, very lucky woman. When I met Josh, I instantly knew that I had found an incredibly special man. I knew he would be an amazing husband–one who would love me and put up with me for the rest of our lives. When I found out we were expecting, I had no doubt in my mind that Josh would end up being the most wonderful father this world has ever seen.

I wasn’t wrong.

Josh, from both Jude and me, I say thank you. Thank you for being a present and involved father. Thank you for being kind and gentle and for keeping a even temper. Thank you for loving us. You are more than either of us could have asked for, and I think more than we both, at times, deserve.

Happy Fathers’ Day, Josh. You’re the best Papa a boy could ask for.

Love,
Us

I got the idea from my upstairs neighbor. She’s a teacher, and thus, crafty. The original idea was to get some finger paint, let Jude put hand prints all over a piece of paper, and frame the picture for Josh. After consulting two friends who are amazing, wonderful, awe-inspiring artists (see Katrina’s work here and Jennifer’s work here), I decided to use acrylic paint on a canvas-covered, three-sided box that would hang on the wall.

Josh was away on a mission trip during the week leading up to Father’s Day, so Jude and I didn’t have to act in secret or try to hide what we were doing. On Saturday, the day before Father’s Day, Jude and I took the L to Evanston and visited our local Dick Blick store. After picking up all the necessary materials, we headed home and got ready for bed.

Early on Sunday morning, Jude and I woke up and got straight to work on creating Josh’s gift. I spread some paint onto a paper plate and helped Jude get the palms of his hands covered. Each time he pressed his hands into the canvas, he smiled and squealed. I wish I had been able to take photos, but I was a bit busy trying to keep the paint on the canvas. He used two different shades of green and brown and he also used white. After Jude finished and the paint dried, I took our newly purchased fancy pen and wrote on the upper and lower edges of the canvas so that Josh would always remember when and for what Jude created such a lovely piece of art.

So, without further ado (and please forgive the poor picture quality!):

Josh didn’t get home from work until nearly 11 last night after having worked for twelve hours. Upon his arrival, he turned to me and told me how sorry he was that I wasn’t able to take time off from work to rest, and that he planned on assuming the role of “Parent on Duty” in the morning and letting me sleep/relax until he had to leave for work at around noon.

This morning? Boy, oh boy… my husband delivered.

Josh got up with Jude and closed the bedroom door, which allowed me to sleep in until 9! While I was sleeping, the boys watched a video or two, had breakfast, and Josh cleaned the kitchen, scooped the litter boxes, and swept the second bathroom. He also packed his lunch/dinner for the day (he won’t be home until at least 9 tonight). After breakfast, Josh got Jude ready and took him on a shopping trip to WholeFoods and left me home to drink tea/eat breakfast/read/relax. Have I mentioned how grateful I am for this man of mine?

I think I’m on my way to the upswing of this illness. All the congestion in my head is breaking up and moving out. Jude also seems to be a bit better, and again, for that I’m really grateful.

Right now it’s nap time for the boy, and I’m going to adhere to my husband’s orders to “rest when the boy rests.” After heating up my therapeutic rice sock, I’m going to lie down and cuddle up with my son. I’m working on getting Jude’s Flickr set updated, so keep an eye out for some new pics in the next day or two!

I’m setting this post to publish at 3:00am EST, because two years ago, at approximately that time, you and I began the 31-hour journey to Jude’s birth together.

Every month, around the 21st, I write a letter to Jude to celebrate another month of his life. Tonight I write to celebrate you and all you did for me during what were the hardest hours of my life to date.

Do you remember walking around the neighborhood during the morning hours on the day before Jude was born? We stopped for every contraction and you would hug me and hold me and help me relax. We looked at all the well-manicured lawns and picked which ones would be nice to sit down on if I needed someplace to rest. I think we called it “birthing waves grass” or something like that. I was in the midst of using my Hypnobabies cues, so it was appropriate.

What I remember most about those hours leading up to Jude’s birth is you. I kept you in focus, and you were always there for me. Do you remember what Dhyana and Mary said? They had never seen a couple like us before–a wife who completely trusted her husband, and a husband who was more attentive and present than anyone they had met at any previous birth. Normal life isn’t as painful as those 31 hours were, but the rest of the details of that experience still hold true: You are my focal point in life. I trust you without question. You are always attentive of my needs and present with me. I notice these things and want you to know that I know that they aren’t little or insignificant parts of our life together. I love you and I feel so, so blessed to have a partner as wonderful as you.

Love,
Me *=

Today my husband and my son treated me to a small, but extremely thoughtful pleasure. I had a great time in the shower (Hey! Getcher mind out of the gutter, you!) and felt… I don’t know… a little girly? like an actual person? when I emerged all clean and nice smelling.

I had a lovely day with my family (for the most part-can you say MELTDOWN at 6:30? Can you?) and am really, really looking forward to spending the next seven days with them.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mamas out there!

Seven years ago today, I met the man who would, in two short years, become my husband; the man who would redefine ‘love’ for me; the man who would be the father of my child. I fell head over heels in love that afternoon…and I haven’t stopped spinning yet.

Seven years ago, I helped my lover load his bag into the back of my mom’s white Mustang. We drove off, holding hands, and started our life together.

Thank you for the best seven years of my life to date, Josh. I love you. *=

Now then. Ahem.

JesusChristAlmightyIneedabreak. I hurt my back early Saturday afternoon and have not gotten more than two hours to myself at a clip since then. When Jude’s awake, so am I. I’m on my feet playing, cooking, cleaning. There’s really no way around this. Josh works. (Duh!) When he’s not at work, he is FANTASTIC about taking care of Jude and letting me rest. But, when he doesn’t get home until 5pm, well… dinner is already made. All that’s left to do is let Jude eat, get the kitchen cleaned up, and get Jude cleaned up and ready for bed. There are only about two hours of “awake” time for Jude once Josh gets home at night, and while I truly, truly appreciate Josh taking the reigns (and he does! without complaint!) for those two hours, it’s just not enough. When I’m feeling good and can walk without shuffling my feet and when I can sit down and stand up without sharp pains surging through my lower half, it’s fine. But now? Five days after I got hurt? When I still can’t sit comfortably or sneeze without crying out in pain? No. Right now it’s not enough.

So what do you do when you’re the stay at home parent and you’re down for the count? What do you do when you don’t have the luxury of taking even one day off to concentrate on healing, resting, and feeling better? Well, this experience has taught me–you have to suck it up. Lunches and dinners still need to be made. Balls need to be kicked and dirt needs to be dug in. Diapers need to be washed. Floors need to be swept. My hard-working husband can only do so much after a full day’s work out of the home. I have to uphold my end of the bargain as well.

And here I could go on about how it’s not fair–How mothers and fathers who stay at home need just as much of a break as parents who work outside the home–but really, what good will it do me? The better option would be for me to close the laptop, lie down next to my sleeping boy, and rest for the remainder of his nap.

*Click*

Right about that time, Josh turned to me and said, “Your job is way harder than mine.”

And that, loyal reader(s?), is why I love my husband.

Also, he’s fantastic in the sack.