Archive for the ‘Josh’ Category

  • Our Rhythm

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    Josh is gone to a youth retreat in the suburbs. He won’t be back until 7pm-ish on Sunday. For those of you keeping track, this means that Jude and I will be on our own for a total of 50 hours. FIFTY FREAKING HOURS. *sigh*

    I really dislike it when Josh has to go away. I don’t like sleeping without him, and I don’t like waking up to an empty spot on the bed. I also don’t like not getting a break from being mama or not being able to shower or use the bathroom (read: go potty) by myself. Oh, and for some reason, whenever Josh goes away, I get sick. This time is no different… I feel a cold coming on, and if you couldn’t guess, I don’t like that either.

    But, people of the internets, I have a secret, and if you promise not to tell my husband, I’ll tell *you.* Okay, you promise? Great!

    When Josh goes away, and it’s just Jude and me roughing it, we tend to have really, really good days together. We fall into this rhythm, and life just seems to flow. Nap time is never a hassle, meal times are a joy, play time is fun, and bed time is early! I don’t know why it is. Perhaps it’s because… well, you know how, when struck with the idea that she may lose her child, a mother could lift a car if need be? Well, I think it’s something like that. Or maybe that’s a bad analogy. What I mean is, well… I guess because I *have* to do everything and because I *need* each day to run smoothly or risk poking myself in the eyes with hot pokers, I just *make* the days good. Or maybe Jude makes the days good. I don’t know, really. But the bottom line is, we have good days (*knocks wood*).

    Still, despite the good days (and being able to turn the heat way, way up without getting the stink eye from *someone*), I still hate it when he’s gone. I get lonely and I miss him. That being said, if any of you local Chicago readers want to take Jude and me in for the weekend… entertain us and what have you, just drop me a line! We like playdates, and God knows if we don’t get out of the house we’re likely to kill each other (I kid!).

  • Outside

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    Yesterday Josh mentioned to me that he thought Jude could say “outside.” Today, I heard him say it with my very own ears. This mama is impressed.

    Just a quick recap of the day since I hurt my neck again and leaning over this computer is super uncomfortable.

    7:20am-I wake up and start baking a batch of muffins. Yum!
    8:30am-Friends Aimee and Miles show up for an early morning play date.
    10:30am-Aimee and Miles head home. I clean.
    11:00am-Nap time.
    11:20am-I lie Jude down and head to the kitchen to prep for dinner.
    12:20pm-Jude wakes up. Play time begins.
    1:30pm-Lunch.
    2:30pm-Get ready for afternoon outing.
    3:00pm-Out the door. Head south to meet up with Aimee and Miles then continue on to the grocery store and eventually, the Common Cup.
    5:00pm-Home. Make minestrone soup and have dinner.
    7:10pm-sit down to nurse Jude.
    7:27pm-Sleeping baby!

  • My Mutant-X Gene Would Be Lameness

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    As Josh and I walked home from picking up a cuppa at the local coffee shop, we passed a sports bar. The bar’s patio was filled with happy and rowdy 20 and 30-somethings having a great time watching the game and enjoying some brew.

    I asked Josh if he ever felt like he was missing out on something by not being able to take part in that lifestyle. He replied no-that he doesn’t feel like he’s missing out by not really having the chance to go out and drink and be rowdy, but sometimes he does wish he could go out with a few friends, enjoy a beer, and stay out until 11:30pm.

    It was at that point I had to remind him that we didn’t even stay out that late before Jude was born, so was he saying that he missed the life he used to lead before he and I got together? NO! Of course not… except that, well, it’s probably true since our lack of fun and crazy outings is really all my fault. I’m super lame, and I think I always have been. When we lived in PA, I didn’t do the bar scene because the bars were much too smoky (and because I valued my sleep and liked to go to bed early). Josh would have gone, despite the smoke, but I think he skipped going because he knew I would make him strip down to his birthday suit and shower the second he walked in the door.

    So, if I were an X-Men, my name would be Lame-o (see, even my name would be lame), and my mutant-x gene would be lameness. I would emit lameness onto all I came into close contact with and they too would cease doing fun things and would instead go to sleep at 9pm and clean their kitchens for fun.

    If you were an X-Men, what would be your name and super power?

  • “Wait! I Want to See What He Does!”

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    Does anyone remember the post I wrote about Josh trying to make breakfast and totally ruining it? My hypothesis was that he feigned incompetence in oatmeal making so that I wouldn’t ever ask him to do it again.

    Well…

    This afternoon, Josh begged off work and we took Jude to Oz Park to play. Jude is getting so, so daring. He climbs on everything…he runs full throttle from Point A to Point B; none of the bumps or bruises he gets phase him. Today, for the first time, he tried (pretty successfully) to climb on the play structure (the part that curves out like a half-circle). As he started his climb, I moved into position behind him, ready to steady him with my hands on his waist, and my dear, dear husband yells, “Wait! I want to see what he does!”

    Seriously?

    Apparently I’m supposed to let my 15-month-old try his hand at independent climbing all for the sake of his father’s enjoyment. Falling be damned! Who cares if he slips and cracks his chin off the bars? So what if he smacks his head off yet another hard surface? Josh wanted to see what Jude would do. What was I thinking, trying to ensure his safety? *sigh*

    So again I am faced with the reality that my husband is just working me. He knows that it’s unsafe to let Jude go all willy nilly on the metal play structure just like he knows how to make oatmeal. Still, he thinks that by making absolutely ridiculous requests that would jeopardize the well-being of our son, I won’t leave them alone together, thereby relieving him of his fatherly duties.

    Well, I’m on to you, husband, and I’m not falling for it. Not only am I going to plan an entire afternoon out for myself, but I think I’ll even let you tackle breakfast in the morning.

  • Celebrating 30 with 30 Reasons

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    30. Because his feet point straight ahead when he walks
    29. Because he gives fantastic hugs
    28. Because he’s an attentive father and husband
    27. Because he watches ANTM with me (and enjoys it)
    26. Because he commuted to this past weekend’s conference without me asking
    25. Because he’s an artist
    24. Because he likes the Alkaline Trio (almost) as much as I do
    23. Because he makes me watch horribly horrible movies
    22. Because he makes me laugh
    21. Because he humors me and my cravings for wine, cheese, crackers, olives, chocolate, and cake
    20. Because he never hesitates to get out of bed and check on the weird noises I tend to hear at night
    19. Because he can secure a broken door and thus, make me feel secure
    18. Because he uses the term “planned obsolescence” in everyday conversation
    17. Because he sets up and delivers the punch line to his own “that’s what she said” jokes
    16. Because he drives for at least 66.66666% of all of our road trips
    15. Because he dances with me
    14. Because looking into his piercing blue eyes never fails to make me melt
    13. Because he forgives easily
    12. Because he laughs often
    11. Because he has a great ass. Seriously. You should check it out.
    10. Because he wears the greatest smelling cologne ever
    09. Because he gives amazing back rubs
    08. Because he appreciates a good cuppa
    07. Because he always sees the best in people
    06. Because he loves cats
    05. Because he has a fabulous sense of direction
    04. Because he’s an amazing kisser
    03. Because he doesn’t go to sleep without telling me he loves me
    02. Because he signs along to Jude’s Veggie Tales CDs
    01. Because he’s kind, caring, sensitive, strong, loving, selfless, and humble

    Today, for Josh’s 30th birthday, I list 30 of the millions of reason why I love him.

    Josh, I cannot imagine my life without you. You make waking up each day a worthwhile endeavor. I’m honored to be your wife…to be able to celebrate your birthday with you year after year. Simply put: I love you. I love you so much my heart aches.

  • Why You Should NEVER Choose Sprint as Your Cell Phone Provider

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    Josh and I are two months short of fulfilling our two-year contract with Sprint. Why we ever chose them in the first place is beyond me. Nearly all of our friends and family are on the Verizon network, and Sprint’s calling area and customer service are poor, at best.

    In Scranton, we got so-so reception. I couldn’t get calls in Target or Wegmans, and it goes without saying that we (just about) always had our calls drop when going through the Notch on our way to Clarks Summit, but other than that, I usually had around three bars. I think both Josh and I were expecting really great coverage in Chicago because, well, it’s Chicago. You know, the Second City? Ton o’ people everywhere you look? Not rural Nebraska? Yeah…that place. I don’t know if we’ve ever been wronger. More wrong. Whatever.

    When we rolled into town on Friday, we almost immediately found out how bad our reception was going to be. While walking down Clark Street (one of the busiest streets in the city), we had spotty reception. Some blocks were dead zones. Others afforded us one or two bars of reception. The Basil Leaf Cafe? Sitting five feet from an open window? Dead zone. Can’t check my message from the call I got while walking to dinner. Can’t call out. Can’t text. My phone keeps taunting me, blinking “Searching for service” at me every time I check to see if I’ve got a signal.

    Knowing that Josh is going to be on Clark Street quite often meeting people for work, and since Clark Street is home to a lot of shops we’ll be frequenting, Josh decided to call Sprint and see if they would work with him in getting out of our contract early.

    Stupidest. Idea. Ever.

    Have I mentioned that Sprint’s customer service is horrible? I think there must be some nastiness screening process that occurs during the hiring process for Sprint customer service representatives (though instead of them not hiring the nastiest of the bunch, they give them huge sign-on bonuses).

    I get that we signed a two-year contract and that they don’t have to let us out of it. Honestly, I get that. What I want to know is, what good does it do them to be rude to their customers and not work with them. By reducing the fee for breaking the contract (not even waiving it!) and having us leave them happily, they would have been ensured some good word-of-mouth publicity about their dedication to their customers. Instead of feeling the need to write this blog post about how utterly horribly they treated my husband, I could be writing about how they treated him with respect, recognized the short-comings of their network, and graciously worked with us on getting out of our contract early since their service is not adequate for where we now live.

    Now, I don’t want this to be a biased post. Here are the three options the jerkwad, eh, I mean, customer service representative/manager offered my husband:

    *1. Buy new phones (and thus sign on for another two year contract). Apparently our phones, being two years old, are not fit to keep up with the, uhm, upgrades they’ve made to their service.

    2. Use a signal booster (provided to us for free). This device would need to be set up at a stationary location.

    3. Break contract to the tune or $200/PER LINE.

    And now, here are the problems that accompany each of the above-listed options:

    Options 1 and 3 require a monetary commitment on our part. Not only would we have to shell out for new phones, but we would also have to commit to paying for two more years of horrible service. Option 3 is self-explanatory.

    Option 2 is just impractical. Josh is constantly on the go for his job, and he needs to have a signal when he’s on the road, whether that be on a mission trip or around the corner having coffee with a couple of kids from his youth group. I need to have a signal when I’m out with Jude. The last thing I need is to get lost in Chicago and not have a way to get in touch with someone who has a sense of direction (and some knowledge of the city). Plus, we actually get decent reception at home, and Josh has a land line he can use at the church.

    Having said all that, Josh and I have come up with a plan. Josh is going to go ahead and sign up for an individual plan with Verizon now. In two months, when our contract with Sprint is up, we’ll upgrade his plan to a family plan. While it will cost a bit more for the next two months, having the additional individual plan for Josh will still cost less than breaking our contract with Sprint early. And at this point, I want to make sure they get as little money as possible from us.

    *Not only does Josh get mad points for dealing with those assholes at Sprint, he also gets bonus points for using the term “planned obsolescence” in an actual conversation. Kudos, babe!

  • Date Night

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    Tonight Josh and I had our first “date night” since Jude was born nearly 14 months ago. Connie, one of Josh’s youth group girls who graduated last year, offered to watch him for us, so we took her up on it!

    I dropped Jude off at Connie’s house at around 4pm. I got back to our place at 4:30, and much to my dismay, Josh was still on the conference call he had started before I left with Jude. He finished up about 10 minutes later, and while he got showered, I read a book. Well, not the whole book, but like, three chapters, uninterrupted. Once Josh got cleaned up, we hung around the house for a bit, then we headed out for dinner at Bazil (the old Fire Grill… man, I miss that place). For the first time in nearly 14 months, I was able to eat slowly and enjoy my food. Josh had a glass of wine (oh yeah, we totally crashed our diet today), and we both had dessert. It was really lovely. We were able to talk and breathe and enjoy each other’s company. I was so relaxed that I was even able to take note of some of the HORRIBLE outfits the other patrons were sporting. Now, I’m not a fashion guru, but let me tell you, even I knew those outfits were B.A.D. bad. I just don’t know what some people are thinking.

    After dinner, Josh and I picked Jude up at Connie’s place. Connie had taken Jude to So. Abington park to play at the splash park. They had a great time. While they were there, they came across a group of people from some new church in Dunmore that was having a picnic or something. Anyway, a crazy old lady from the group tried to force-feed my son orange drink. (Now, I have my own “orange drink story,” Dr. Jennifer…ugh.) Connie did a great job of warding her off, but man, how crazy is that? I wish I was there… I would have love have put the smack-down on the crazy old bat. I’m feeling feisty tonight.

    I really thought Jude was going to crash as soon as we got home, but I was wrong. He nursed for just a little bit, and then he wanted to play. I took some time to use the bathroom while he was playing, and by the time I can out he had fallen asleep. On his bedroom floor. Without the aid of a boob in his mouth. And he didn’t cry.

    Josh was so happy. He picked the boy up and sat down in the glider and just rocked and rocked with him. I got one picture before the batteries in the camera died. Now the boy is lying next to me, conked out. He had a busy day, and so did we. Goodnight, all!

  • Lifestyle Changes

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    Josh and I have decided to try and make July a “buy nothing” month. Okay, so “nothing” is a little drastic sounding. Perhaps saying that we’re going to try and make July a “crap-buying-free” month would be more accurate. In an effort to save some money and stay within our newly tightened budget, we’re going to forgo our semi-frequent trips to the local coffee shops, our far-too-often trip to the local deli, and our simply out of control chocolate binges (okay, that last one is all mine).

    During July, Josh and I are also going to overhaul our eating habits. Generally speaking, we eat pretty well. We love fresh veggies and whole grains. We eat mainly organic foods and little processed crap. That being said, I, personally am addicted to sugar (see comment on chocolate binges in previous paragraph), and I would like not to be. Quite a few months ago, Josh met with a woman who is well-known for her knowledge on homeopathy and the like. She suggested he overhaul his diet and also ordered some homeopathic medicines for him. I, unfortunately, haven’t gotten to meet with her yet. My plan was to wait until Jude was done nursing, but by the looks of things, we will have moved out of the area long before he weans himself. Anyway, Josh and I are going to be cutting out white flour, sugar, caffeine, and alcohol for the next month or so. Oh, and we’re going to revamp our vegetarian efforts. Wish us luck. I know that giving up sugar is going to be the hardest part for me. We’ve almost cut white flour out of our diets entirely already, we don’t drink often as it stands now, and coffee? Well… giving up coffee might post a bit of a problem, but I think in the end we’ll both feel better.

    I’m really excited to be doing all of this. I want Jude to grow up eating a healthy, whole foods diet, and for that to happen, Josh and I need to be doing the same. I’ll be posting this week’s menu later today in case anyone is interested in what we’re going to be eating. Oh, and I also have some pictures from this weekend that I’ll be posting later, so come back and check out the super cuteness that is my son!

  • Josh Thinks It’s Funny

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    Josh, Jude, and I were in the car A LOT today. We spent so much time driving that we listened to Jude’s newest Veggie Tales CD at LEAST four times through. I forget why it came up, but at one point I told Josh that I’ve been singing “God Is Bigger” when I’m home alone with Jude and scared. He thought that was hilarious and told me I should post about it.

    Here are the lyrics:

    “God Is Bigger”
    Bob: You were lying in your bed
    You were feeling kind of sleepy
    But you couldn’t close your eyes because the room was getting creepy.
    Larry: Were those eyeballs in the closet?
    Was that Godzilla in the hall?

    Bob: There was something big and hairy casting shadows on the wall.
    Now your heart is beating like a drum
    Your skin is getting clammy.
    There’s a hundred tiny monsters jumping right into your jammies!

    Bob: What are going to do?
    Junior: I’m going to call the police!
    Bob: No! You don’t need to do anything!
    Junior: What? Why?
    Bob: Because …

    Chorus:
    Bob: God is bigger than the boogie man
    He’s bigger than Godzilla, or the monsters on TV
    Oh, God is bigger than the boogie man
    And He’s watching out for you and me.

    Junior: So, when I’m lying in my bed
    And the furniture starts creeping
    I’ll just laugh and say, “Hey, cut that out!”
    And get back to my sleeping
    ‘Cause I know that God’s the biggest
    And He’s watching all the while.
    So, when I get scared I’ll think of Him
    And close my eyes and smile!

    Chorus

    Monster #1: So, are you frightened?
    Junior: No, not really.
    Monster #2: Are you worried?
    Junior: Not a bit.
    I know what ever’s gonna happen,
    That God can handle it.

    Frankencelery: I’m sorry that I scared you when you saw me on TV.

    Junior: Well that’s okay,
    ‘Cuz now I know that God is taking care of me!

    Chorus

    Junior: One more time!

    All: God is bigger than the boogie man
    He’s bigger than Godzilla, or the monsters on TV
    Oh, God is bigger than the boogie man
    And He’s watching out for you and me.

    Monster #1: Watchin’ …
    Monster #2: Watchin’ …
    Monster #3: Watchin’ …
    Junior: Out for you and me! Yeah

    Is it really that funny that I’ve been reduced to singing songs written by talking vegetables? Yes?

    Oh.

  • 96 Times More Bitter

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    Today was my first day working full-time at Finn Chiropractic. I came home from the first part of my day, 8:30am-12pm, EXHAUSTED. I don’t know what was wrong with me. I hadn’t felt that tired in a long time. I honestly thought I was going to crash my car because I was in such a fog. Luckily, I made it home unscathed.

    At home, while I was making lunch for the boys and myself, Josh started telling me about his morning with Jude. The little guy was super tired, and cried himself to an exhausted sleep on Josh’s chest. This phenomenon of falling asleep sans boob in the mouth rarely occurs, and Josh was STOKED to get to indulge in a two-hour-long nap with his son. I have to be honest, people of the internet… I was bitter at hearing that news. There I was, so. freaking. tired. and hungry. and tired. and wanting sympathy, and what do I get? A play-by-play of all the napping goodness my husband and son shared. Jerks.

    I expressed my displeasure at having missed out on the napping to Josh. “And yes,” I said, “I do realize that I get to nap with Jude all the time, but I DON’T CARE (insert foot stomping)! I’m tired (stomp!), and you got to nap TODAY (stomp, stomp!). And IT’S NOT FAIR (pout!)!” That short monologue got me a rather amused look, and after some quick math work, Josh told me that he was 96 times more bitter than I was.

    Josh’s math is a little off, though I don’t think he realizes it yet. Josh somehow equated me working three times a week for about eight months with me napping just three times a week for eight months. (3 times/week at an average of 4 weeks in a month times 8 months of Jude’s life equals 96 times more bitter than I am.) In reality, the math really works out like this:

    Number of days Jude has been alive – 391
    Average number of naps I take with Jude daily – 1.5
    Total number of days I haven’t napped with Jude – 3

    *(391-3) X 1.5 = 582

    By my calculations, Josh should be 582 times more bitter than I am for having missed out on napping with our son. I guess I’m lucky he majored in English and not math. Could you imagine the resentment if he realized that he had the right to be more than 6 times more bitter than he thinks he ought to be? Wow.

    *Don’t forget 5th grade math. Order of operations = P E D/M A/S

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